Some commenters ask why I even pay attention to what the Daily Mail says about the Windsors and the Duke and Duchess of Sussex. This story is a good reason why: because the palaces are in open communication with the Mail’s editors, columnists and reporters, and both sides yank each other’s leashes constantly. The Mail does not have a parasitic relationship with the Windsors – they have an evil symbiosis, working in concert with one another. So, during Prince Harry’s four-day visit to the UK, Mail columnist Amanda Platell wrote several violent hissy fits about his trip and how Prince William is plotting to destroy Harry when the time comes. Then everything shifted, and suddenly no one could deny that William and Kate are lazy idiots who were pitifully trying to “compete” with Harry. Platell’s volte-face was astonishing, and she wrote that Harry’s visit should be a wake-up call for the sulky “Prince and Princess of Boring.” Just a few days later and at least one call from Kensington Palace, and Platell changed her tune once again in this piece: “I’m so disgusted with myself for the cruel thing I said about Kate… I’m choking on my words now I know the truth. Kate, I’m just so sorry.”
On Saturday, in the wake of Prince Harry’s whirlwind ‘pseudo-royal tour’ and the reconciliation with his father, King Charles, I warned of the dangers to the monarchy of the return of his prodigal son. I lamented that the Prince and Princess of Boring, William and Kate, had decided to hide away from the public eye at such a critical time, even questioning the wisdom of Kate’s two dull visits to textile factories as Harry was adorably high-fiving disabled children at the Diana Awards, set up in honour of his mum.
Well, I’m now not just eating my words – but choking on them, after reading details of the Princess of Wales’s hectic itinerary for President Trump and First Lady Melania’s historic second State visit to Britain. President Trump has said himself that he and Melania are ‘thrilled’ the Princess will be ‘front and centre’ during their visit. A Trump source added: ‘The inclusion of Princess Kate in so many events during the state visit is an honour.’
I now regret that I overlooked what a valuable asset Kate is to the Royal family and for that, I owe her an apology. Given her high-profile role in the diplomatic proceedings, I am now astonished that mum-of-three Kate, who let’s not forget is still recovering from cancer, even managed to squeeze in those two textile factory visits, alongside the extensive preparations required for Trump’s visit.
I can only imagine how many hours are required to plan her outfits for the coming days – for she will certainly perfect the respectful, dazzling, dignified looks fit for a Presidential visit. How many trips did her hairdresser have to make to finesse a hair-do upon which to perch a priceless Windsor tiara?
When I wrote on Saturday, I was forgetting that when Kate puts on the glamour and the glitz, her presence is incomparable. She is still the shining jewel in the Royal crown, one of the most photographed women in the world with the enigmatic magic of Princess Diana.
It is satisfying to see that media coverage of the Trump tour has already eclipsed Prince Harry’s visit, which I can now see for what it was: a desperate bid from the disgraced Prince to ingratiate himself back not just into his father’s good books, but also to remind us all of his inalienable Royal status as fifth-in-line to the throne. A status which has made him and his wife millions through their Netflix documentary and Harry’s own memoir Spare.
I wonder if we’re supposed to read some of this with an eyeroll, because Platell couldn’t be more obvious with her regurgitated palace talking points, specifically the Waity PR: that everyone should be on their knees with gratitude that Kate does some jazz hands during state visits, that she’s the second coming of Diana, that she’s the jewel in the crown, for goodness sake! It’s purposefully over-the-top, right? Right?? Anyway, I’m sure she got a call from the palace. They must have panicked because what happens if they lose the support of one of the most deranged royalists at the Mail? It’s funny to think that Platell is the Deranger equivalent of Walter Cronkite. Anyway, the second half of this is just rage and insults at Prince Harry, so it’s back to regularly scheduled programming after several days of people calling out William in particular.
Photos courtesy of Avalon Red, Cover Images.
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